Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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