Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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