so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Randomize
