Buhtt sex?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Randomize
