Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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