I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
