what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
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