it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Randomize
