woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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