How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
