Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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