My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
