doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
