I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
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