I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
