I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I just want to make out with him forever
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize