lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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