I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
When are your genitals available?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Randomize
