Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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