Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Non-Jews are for practice
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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