Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
This show inspires me to have sex in space
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
