you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
