Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
