Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
pop tarts are not kleenex
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
