Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
