I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Randomize