I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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