I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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