You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Randomize
