It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
