I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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