Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
