The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Your cock deserves a montage
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
