i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
