The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
