Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
