oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
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