Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize