I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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