You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
this hospital has no fireball
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
