16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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