how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
