I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize