i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
and she was petting her beer can
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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