i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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