She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
