I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
