i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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