bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
