Im at strip club and am horny
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
